POV: (Another) Health Update + 15 Things This Week

It's only May, and 2023 is the longest year of my life.

I’m back after taking last week off Substack to recover from surgery. Thank you for supporting me and my work and allowing me to take rest when I need it. Your support really means the world to me.

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Well here I am again with another health update. In case you missed it, here’s the last one. Maybe you saw on my Instagram post last week, but in case not, let’s recap. Last Sunday I woke up at around 5am with excruciating abdominal pain. I went to the bathroom relatively normally and then went back to bed. The pain got worse. I went to the bathroom again and this time I fainted in a cold sweat on the bathroom floor. I had diarrhea and was vomiting. The Sunday before I had a 24-hour bout of food poisoning, which is pretty par for the course here in Mexico, so I thought, “Wow, I have food poisoning again. What luck.” I thought the pain would get better after vomitting, etc., but when I went back to bed to rest, I found it was getting worse and worse. It honestly felt like someone was stabbing me with a knife in the area around my belly button and all along my right side. I started to get worried, thinking maybe it was my appendix. Looking up symptoms online confirmed my fears. I woke my boyfriend up and told him I was in a lot of pain. Like the type of pain where you are literally moaning and whimpering nonstop because it hurts so bad. We both decided we should go to the hospital. Best case scenario it was actually food poisoning and they just give me some IV fluids. But we thought better to go in and have it checked in case it’s wasn't the best case scenario.

We arrived to the first hospital that was the closest one to our new apartment around 8am. The front desk people were quite rude. My boyfriend was not getting a good vibe, and I was in so much pain that I was just slumped over in a chair not participating too much. Luckily that hospital told us they didn’t accept my insurance, so I looked into my insurance paperwork and found one that did. We Ubered over to ABC Observatorio and arrived there around 9:15. Totally different story over there. The front desk was so accommodating and while my boyfriend was filling out paperwork and working on insurance stuff, they admitted me immediately to the ER.

They asked me a series of questions and then got pretty quickly to ordering a bunch of tests: blood, urine, CT scan and eventually an ultrasound. After the CT scan, the doctor told me that everything looked normal except my gallbladder was very inflamed so they wanted to do an ultrasound to see what was going on inside. After the ultrasound, a different doctor came in to see me (knew this was probably not a good sign). He introduced himself as Dr. Kraus, a general surgeon, and told me that my gallbladder was infected (acute cholecystitis) and he was 100% positive that it needed to be taken out that day. He said there weren't any gallstones, but there was a thick sludge that was mostly blocking a duct. I asked him how long this was going on, and he said there wasn't any way of knowing, but that my digestive issues over the last several months definitely could be related to this.

I sort of just lie there in semi-shock (and pain), but I wasn’t immediately panicked, nervous or scared. I had a pretty intense and very traumatic 8-day hospital stay when I was 25, so this all felt relatively chill compared to that experience. And I think with everything that’s been going on since I froze my eggs in December, I was kind of just like, “Well of course this is happening.” I asked a lot of questions. Mostly about how not having a gallbladder would effect my life, if I would still be able to get pregnant and have babies, if there would be a lot of scars on my belly, stuff like that. Then Dr. Kraus told us he’d give us time to think and to text him when we knew what we wanted to do. I didn’t really feel like there was an alternative. I was at the best hospital in Mexico City, so it’s not like I was going to leave and get a second opinion at another hospital. I called my mom, who was a nurse for the entirety of her 40-year career, and who’s been treating me via telemedicine since I moved to Oregon when I was 18. After a long chat with her (found out both my grandmothers had their gallbladders removed), I made the decision that I would go into emergency surgery in 3 hours.

I waited for the panic, the anxiousness to come, but they never did. I’ve been through a lot emotionally and physically in my life, and I guess here was one situation that I was just willing and able to adapt to right away without my emotional world taking me on a ride. In a lot of ways, I felt relieved. January, February and most of March were extremely dark for me mentally. Probably some of the darkest of my life. I felt so unsure of what was going on in my body and with no real answers, so my mind was constantly going to the worst and darkest places. So although this emergency health situation and surgery were shocking, I at least knew what was going on finally. Something concrete. Dr Kraus told me after looking at my CT scan that everything else in my body was fine. And he later told me after surgery, that he saw with his own eyes most of my organs and they were all fine. So in a lot of ways, it felt like a tremendous weight had been lifted. My mind wasn’t in a place of guessing, of not knowing. So much of my stress over the past several months came from not having answers, to feeling like I had no idea what was going on with my body. To finally feel like I could wrap my head around the situation felt good, even though I had to go into surgery and have an organ removed. Not knowing really is the hardest part sometimes.

The surgery went as well as it could have. I came out nauseated and vomiting, in a lot of pain, but my boyfriend and his brother were waiting for me in my hospital room after I left recovery, so that made me smile. The first night was pretty rough. My surgeon is against giving narcotic pain killers, which is actually great but sucks when you’re in a lot of pain. But I made it through with Tylenol and ice packs. The hospital honestly felt like a 5-star hotel. The nurses were all so nice and attentive. The room was spacious and comfy. And even the food wasn’t so bad. Honestly, the best hospital experience I’ve ever had, and I usually hate hospitals so that’s saying something.

I’m still trying to make sense of what has gone down over the last 6 months. My best guess is that the IVF/egg freezing hormone injections triggered gallbladder issues, and none of my doctors were diagnosing me correctly. Come to find out birth control, hormone therapy, IVF and pregnancy (more hormones) can all bring on gallbladder disease. Not sure why the fertility clinic didn’t know about this. Oh well. I actually remember on like night 6/7 of injections, I got this severe pain that wouldn’t go away, felt like being stabbed, down the right side of my abdomen. I went into the fertility clinic the next morning to have it checked out. They did a vaginal ultrasound to make sure it wasn’t an ovarian torsion (it wasn’t), gave me a painkiller and sent me home. I asked them what it was and they said they didn’t know/it wasn’t normal. It continued to hurt for the next 36 hours. In retrospect, I think it must have been my gallbladder. For most of January and February, I was consistently having pain around my belly button that moved over to the right side of my abdomen and sometimes radiated into my back - all symptoms of gallbladder problems. I even had an abdominal ultrasound in February, but nothing was detected. While I was in the hospital, various tests showed I had E. Coli, Salmonella and a parasite, so I’m sure those were not helping my situation. I ended up having to get antibiotic injections in my butt the first 3 days I was home from the hospital to clear the Salmonella. Some other antibiotics to clear the others. Ultimately it sounds like it was gallbladder issues and also some bacterial stuff that tipped things over the edge. Not sure if I had/ever had SIBO even though that’s what I was originally being treated for. It’s all sort of a mystery, as health things so often are.

I’m just really hoping this was the grand finale of the last 6 months of health struggles. Because honestly I don’t think I can take much more. I’ve been home from the hospital for about a week, each day getting a little better. I’m on a very limited diet as a I heal from the surgery and as my body adjusts to not having a gallbladder. The main thing is the body’s ability to digest fats is impaired without a gallbladder. A lot of people can return to a normal/pre-surgery diet after 1-3 months, while others have to adjust their diets longer term, as digesting fats can remain difficult. Only time will tell how things will go for me, but I am hopeful. I was in so much pain and digestive distress before this emergency, so I’d like to imagine it won’t get that bad again. I was on the low fodmap diet for 4 months and now with this bland foods (for the Salmonella)/low fat diet, I feel like I can handle literally anything. But honestly, I just want to be a normal human again. I just want to feel good in my body and to eat the foods that bring me joy without pain. So I’m investing in taking really good care of myself during this post-operative period in hopes that I can get back to feeling more like me. And maybe actually get to enjoy some of 2023 before it’s over.

Hopefully this is my last health update post for a while…

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And on a lighter note, I wanted to leave you with:

15 Things This Week —

1. I just got this shower head that filters the water, and I’m obsessed. The water in CDMX is very heavily treated, and I’ve been wanting a filtered shower head to protect my skin and hair for a while now. Softer everything! And also the water flow is perfect.

2. Been using a new daily sunscreen and I’m obsessed. I started using the same brand’s face cleanser a couple years ago, and it’s my fave cleanser I’ve ever used. I ordered the sunscreen immediately after seeing on my skincare guru’s Stories the other day. While I can’t get so many things here in Mexico, the one amazing perk of living here is I can get my hands on literally any French drugstore beauty product. There are so many good ones that just aren’t available in the US.

3. Just started reading this book and it feels like perfect timing with everything I’m going through. When you really look around at the world we live in, the systems we uphold, it’s no wonder so many of us are sick, battling chronic health issues and struggling to heal.

4. This is the best podcast I’ve listened to in a while. All about inflammation, hormones and the immune system. Amanda and Dr. Heather touch on so many topics that are relevant to my life right now. This entire Expert Series is so good.

5. Ok, I thought Yellowstone was good, and then I binged 1883 and 1923, and wow. I’m definitely a sucker for historical fiction anything, especially when it includes the Oregon Trail. In 1883, I cried my eyes out in almost every episode. In 1923, I fell in love with Spencer and Alex’s captivating romance. Don’t worry if you haven’t watched Yellowstone, these limited series stand well on their own.

6. THIS SHOW!!!! OMG. It’s so good. The acting is incredible. Ali Wong is my new favorite. I watched it in less than 24 hours. I want to watch it over and over. Tried watching other shows since (this, this and this) and nothing compares.

7. So excited for this one coming out in November. I loved the first one so much. I've watched it 3 times.

8. It’s important to acknowledge and understand the cost and the impact some trendy and commonly used wellness products have on the environment and its people, so we can make the most informed decisions possible as consumers.

9. As the mezcal industry has boomed over the last 5 years, this is something I’ve thought about a lot, and I’m glad someone is writing about it and educating people on how mezcal is made and what impact that has on the land and for the environment. It’s always better to support smaller producers if/when you can.

10. Once I’m back to eating a wider range of things, these gf, vegan cookies are on the top of my list.

11. Speaking of sweets, dying to get my hands on a copy of this new cookbook by Violet Cakes. Also includes gf, refined sugar free and vegan recipes!

12. Why is this sold out literally everywhere? And why is it that when something is sold out everywhere I want it even more? Since I’m doing the low-fat thing, I’ve been wanting to steam everything, but I don’t have a steamer and this one is perfect. Anyone have a hot tip on where I can find one outside of Japan?

13. This newly opened spot in Merida is on my travel radar. Even though I’ve been struggling to work at all, I’m just generally craving a vacation after the stressful events of the past several months.

14. This is the point in the year when everyone starts heading over to Europe for vacation and I get extremely jealous. Last year the FOMO was so real that I booked a ticket to Copenhagen and left the next day. So in honor of all these upcoming European adventures that I’m sure some of you have planned, I’ll be releasing my guide to CPH next week on Substack, so stay tuned and consider becoming a paid subscriber if you aren’t already.

15. Two new (to me) places in NYC that I’m adding to my list for my next visit, which will hopefully be next month! All the baked goods, I’m drooling. I feel like this one could become a staple. I’ll be releasing a longer guide to NYC probably at the end of June or early July after our trip!